Privacy Between Husband and Wife?

Posted: May 31, 2011 in Philosophy (daw)

I’m reminded of this topic whenever I see Kris Aquino. In many of her movies, when someone operates her phone, either her kids or her husband, without her knowledge, she would say in a calm and out of tune tone, “Please, respect my privacy,” and she would turn her back and walk away. (Peace to those who like Kris :P)

There are lots of wives doing that to their husbands, but to not dubbed I’m singling out women, may I add then that in “some cases,”[stress] men also do the same. But in general, women do that a lot. he he he [fish]

Now,my question is, should privacy be practiced between a husband and a wife? If so, up to what level?

When two different individuals come to know each other, of course, their secrets are veiled. He/she shares only those secrets to his/her intimate friends. However, when those two individuals build a relationship that is more than just friendship, they begin to open those secrets — as much as possible, there should not be secrets between them. But since they are not yet married, although they are both in the same relationship, they still cannot spill all their secrets.

So when the time rolls and comes that those two get married, everything becomes “conjugal”, as attested by their signatures on their marriage papers.As provision of the being “one”, everything they have becomes the property of each other; in fact, even their very own souls – body, thought, heart and emotions, do not  solely belong to just one, but rather each becomes each one’s property.

Their very secrets then are revealed; even their disturbing smallest mole becomes visible in each others eyes. BUT……

Computer Technology Enters~

She gets a phone,and so does he… she gets email account, and so does he… she gets facebook account, and so does he… and then the world turns chaos. The woman begins to ask privacy in connection to her cellphone – that the husband should not touch it without her permission, or to avoid her account getting hacked by her husband or opened without her knowing, she makes her passwords complicated. In fact, she would even bring her phone in the bathroom, just in case. 🙂 Wow, isn’t that romantic!

But, is that sane? The same person you’ve shared your promises of love till death parts the two of you becomes “alien” when it comes to your personal things?

I still believe that between a couple, there should not be privacy. Share everything with your husband, and the husband must do the same, unless, you’ve got some secrets to hide as the comic strip has pointed out. [Forget about Kris Aquino :P]

  1. I believe that personal things should always be kept private. Respecting ones’ privacy is a show of respect. After all why would my partner/wife snoops my cellphone, emails, facebook if she trust me? If I may add, doing such would tantamount that she dont trust me.

  2. sedbloggy says:

    @ mang lawrence,
    indeed. but that’s not a matter of respect or trusting each other, well, say there’s a bit of both but it’s more on why would you not let me see your texts or open your email accounts? are there things in there that you don’t want me to see? yes, i trust you,but why?

    • Butchikay says:

      Trust is not questionable when you got married. because marriage is surrendering and sharing all what you can share and what you can have. To those who want privacy, DON”T GET MARRIED. If you want to keep your privacy, then don’t get a relationship that requires sharing everything. Afterall, what will be the reason to keep everything to your husband/wife? unless, you want to hide something right? Everything is conjugal when you got married. From the smallest things… up to the biggest one.

  3. sedbloggy says:

    i agree to that adre…. one secret of good relationship is transparency… openness to each other.. well, im not married yet, but i can spell that out with great conviction.

  4. Butchikay says:

    I have a friend na nalagay sa alanganin because of that “privacy” thing. She has a husband, and she believes na okay lang talaga sa isang mag-asawa na magshare sa lahat ng bagay…. Kahit nga ATM ng husband diba??? at si wifey ang nagbabudget for the house. naniniwala kasi ako na, kapag mag-asawa na, talagang mawawala ang privacy thing na yan. Hindi dahil you don’t trust each other, it’s just that you are conjoined in a relationship na panghabangbuhay. Kung nag hahoneymoon/lovemaking ba sila, masasabi mo na “oist wag mong titignan yung akin ha, give me privacy” hindi naman diba? hahahah.. kahit nga to your own body diba??? mawawala na hahahah… anyways, ang naging issue ay dahil sa FB account. Ang tanong… “bakit daw alam ni wifey ang FB account ni Hubby??” aba’y natural… mag-asawa yan diba? kung sa mag bf/gf nga, ultimo cp minsan di maiiwasan na icheck. Sa mga humihingi ng privacy… WAG NA LANG KAYO MAKIPAG GF/BF /ASAWA. Just stay single para you can keep your privacy forever. Respect and trust. You can respect each other without hiding anything. So, kahit ibigay mo sa kanya ang FB account mo or cp okz lang kasi you are confident enough to say na… “okay go ahead … im giving you the right because you are my husband/wife.” You married her/him because you are giving him/her an authority to share,give,taking care of each other etc…. “I trust you as well that’s why i’m giving you this kind of authority. “When you exchange vows in the church… “for better or for worse, in sickness and in health… till death do us part” wala naman sinabing “for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, but sometimes give me privacy, till death do us part” hehehe…

  5. sedbloggy says:

    hahahha, adre, normal ka palang nito ah.. hindi pa highblood.. hahahhahahah, pero may laman. 🙂

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